An Honour Indeed??

It's been brought to my attention that the school , apparently due to a dearth of contributions to its annual publication. the school magazine("Bhavana"....hehehe...), has chosen to browse through student blogs, hoping for juicy material to consider as articles! This is among the many blogs that has come under the scanner, and though not all that was read would have pleased the teachers who scouted this domain out, it appears that 1 article has caught their eye.......the blog post titled "An Emotional Void........." has been chosen to feature in this year's school magazine! Regardless to say, I've got mixed feelings about this "honour"........though it is gratifying( and fuel for my expanding ego.....hehehe) to be noticed for something of this sort, it is at the same time a bit....ummm..... revealing(and perhaps a bit...umm...exploitative?? ) for such a personal post to be published in a school magazine! Were it an article on a public event, or a tragedy of the magnitude of the recent spate of violence in Kenya and Pakistan, it would not have raised any alarm bells......But for something as personal as that post, written in the most informal of language to be published, raises doubts in my mind. Needless to say, though I've given them the go-ahead, and not raised my concerns yet, I guess these doubts will be addressed only once copies of the school magazine pass into everyone's hands!

"I Open at the Close"

Yes, I know I've shamelessly ripped off a line from a text worshipped by so many readers around the world, but nothing else seemed to fit the bill quite so well! The day draws near, and my emotions never cease to amaze me! What is it about February 8th that keeps drawing my attention to blogging? Simply what it represents, an end of an era.....the end of innocence....the end of simplicity! The world awaits just beyond the gates of the classroom. It is harsh, challenging, and uncompromising, often denying rewards even to those who truly merit them! Everything I've experienced, everything I've learnt, about myself, about others, about friendship,trust,relationships, and honesty, will come under intense scrutiny!

Is it daunting? Undoubtedly....It scares some, and excites others, yet there is no denying the magnitude of this moment! It is often said that friendships are never more loyal, trust never so easily gained, and honesty never so common a virtue, as in one's fledgeling school life. Though I pray each day for these to be merely whisperings of the lonely and the utterly depressed, I've learnt enough not to succumb to wishful thinking!

February 8th will be a landmark day! Some will remember it for the number of elderly feet they touched, hoping to seek the blessings of the faculty that had toiled hard for their education. Regardless of their merits and flaws, one cannot deny that these individuals have never given less than their all to guide and enlighten us( though with varying degrees of success), and that deserves not only our respect, but also our gratitude. Dedication is a rare virtue, and though I most likely won't touch the feet of all my teachers(past and present), I doubt if I'll be able to leave without a creaking back! ........Some will remember it for the joy of our final school evaluation....though the marks may notbe flattering, the incredible relief of washing our hands off our pre-boards will be incomparable!......Some will remember it for the hours(literally) they'd spent preparing for their last class photo! Though I can't honestly deny that I'd wash my face at least 4-5 times and have several glances at the mirror, and do almost anything in my power to alter my distinctly un-photogenic nature..(hehehe....c'mon, Its only HUMAN nature to be narcissistic!! )! Yet, I'd hope none of these would overshadow what I'd really want to celebrate this day as!

What I, personally, would want for Farewell, would be a nice, noisy, raucous celebration! For one last time, I'd like to see this batch raise hell(in a non-destructive manner...hehehe)...milk the last moments for what they are worth! Try, in any and every possible way, to create moments that we could treasure for eternity! Seek the company of our close friends, reach out to those with whom we've had meaningless tiffs and minor quarrels, speak from our hearts and not hide our true thoughts and feelings for fear of ridicule! I'd like to see an entertainment programme that would truly entertain(unlike the farewell bash we'd thrown for our seniors)....for all senior-junior squabbles to be settled by one quiet(or noisy) show of respect for an outgoing batch of teary-eyed kids, soon to step into a world of unknown possibilities(and dangers)! Even a haplessly dull programme would not irk me, granted the efforts behind them remain true and honest! Would I like to sing in that programme?---HELL YES, that's not even a debate....I could see no better way of rounding off the year than by performing one last time in front of my batch, regardless of how it turns out....I may not be the most popular, and I'll accept that, but each one of them is still popular with me!SOLO?..No, unless you gave each talented singer in our batch a solo...I'd like nothing more than to perform in the same company that I have for the last 2 years, for I've enjoyed every single moment!..............

It would perhaps be the easiest way to heal the deep scars that my heart will surely bear for a few days to come. But it's only after you close your heart to your beloved existence at this stage, that you learn to open your heart to welcome in others later on!