An Education In Itself

It is said that certain experiences in our lives leave a more lasting impression than others, if only for their uniqueness and individuality......rare moments seldom reproduced during our existence, moments of revelation, or exceptional clarity. Today was such a day. For the first time, arguably, in my entire life, I know why people dedicate years of their young lives in the hopes of clearing a SINGLE exam.....I've realized the worth of that effort! Granted, the realization may have come all too late, but not in my eyes at least. IIT-JEE 2008 is an exam I shall remember forever, not because of an exceptional performance( "below-par" in truth) or a session of genius on my part, but for something completely different. For the first time, I've understood the true meaning of "conceptual clarity"....the persistent dream of knowing your subject as well as the patterns of your palm lines. Though the exam, in certain respects, was a lot easier than in previous years, I feel a sense of satisfaction I have seldom felt anytime during my school life. I have finally faced a TRUE test of learning.....and it excites me, to be honest! There is an inescapable thrill that you feel when your intelligence is probed in such a manner, rather than your memory tested through random insignificant questions!

To speak of my performance, I attempted a whole lot more questions than I expected, but I fear a majority of them are negatives, which is why I prefer not to chance a guess at my overall score! Minimal knowledge and calculated guesswork may work wonders in lesser exams, but do little to enhance your score in this one! What I do know, is that regardless of the outcome, I have made no recognisable effort to warrant any such dream result! Yet, inspite of the end result, I feel happy and content. I know now that I cannot leave this exam without having a proper crack at it, which is why, in all likelihood, I shall retry next year.....Is it futile? If entry to an IIT is the criteria, then in all likelihood, it will be, but more than entry to such a reputed institute, I want to match my wits with these examiners once again......but this time, fully prepared, and armed with the fundamental clarity that I so obviously lacked during this attempt! The money that has been spurned on this occasion, is of little consequence, for there are experiences and adventures in this world that far outweigh their costs....and this, I feel, is among them! Adieu IIT, but the dream, for me, has just started, and I hope to work towards it for the next year, God Willing..........

P.S. : I realize that through this post, I invite labels of "geek", "nerd", "bookworm", and the like, which a majority of my friends know I'm not....but in hindsight, perhaps I ought to have been! There is no substitute for dedication and hard work, and the tags that accompany it should mean little to a true learner!